Happiness Model – Which one is yours?

Here is two model of defining your happiness.

Model A (in Left): Happiness is the main factor & others items surrounding it are by products. Being happy attracts good in every other thing surrounding it. You want to stay happy to achieve good in everything.

Model B (in Right): Happiness is by-product of all other items surrounding it. Only when good happens in other items, it gives rise to happiness. You want to stay good in everything to achieve happiness.

Happiness Model

Happiness Model

So which Model is yours? Left (Or) Right?

Techniques to deal with Desires & Wishes

Desires or wishes are nothing but our thoughts that are formed to get worldly items (it can be knowledge, wealth, pleasure, relationship, etc) that we like to acquire one or the other day. To deal with desires, we are using different techniques. Each one has its pros & cons.

Technique of Indulgence – This technique tells “If you have a desire, Go get it.” In that way, you can make sure it will be achievable in your life. Though we get the desire fulfilled immediately but we cannot say surely that it is removed fully.

Technique of Suppression – This technique tells “Whenever a desire comes to your mind, you tell yourself that it is wrong to have the thought”. Though this helps for short period, but it leads to depression. Also, this is the technique used if indulgence is not possible any more or desire cannot be fulfilled by any means.

Technique of Distraction – This technique tells “whenever a desire comes to your mind, distract it with some activity that occupies it”. Again here it helps for a short time. Many people goes to movie just to practice this technique – forget the worries for couple of hours & comes to old status once they come out of movie theatre.

Technique of Sublimation –  This technique tells “whenever a desire comes to your mind, convert it or transform it to a higher level of need (life goal) instead of indulgence or suppression”. We can practice the technique of setting an ultimate goal in mind & reminding it whenever a distracting desire or wish pops up.

Sigmund Freud says “Sublimation is a mature type of defense mechanism where socially unacceptable impulses or idealizations are consciously transformed into socially acceptable actions or behavior, possibly resulting in a long-term conversion of the initial impulse”

Sublimation is when displacement “serves a higher cultural or socially useful purpose, as in the creation of art or inventions” – Wade and Tavris

Though we are practicing all the above techniques in life, Sublimation technique is the best as it is transformational in nature with long-term effect.

Situations to use Transactional Leadership in Team

Transactional leadership occurs when the leader rewards the team member, depending on the adequacy of the team member’s performance. Transactional leadership depends on contingent reinforcement, either positive contingent reward (CR) or the more negative active or passive forms of management-by-exception (MBE-A or MBE-P). [1]

Here are some situations I can think of.

* Use CR – when you found team member is motivated with some kind of reward & you can arrive a mutual agreement with your team member on reward he is getting after the work done is expected fashion.

* Use MBE-A – when you don’t want a mistake/error done by your team member propagates further that may jeopardize the project. You actively get the statuses, problems, challenges, develop processes, ensure adherence of project processes, conduct reviews, etc so that no error goes beyond certain time period. This really required when you manages a critical project & have time to do micro management. This is used when team member is having less experience in the work area. MBE-A may be required and effective in some situations, such as when safety is paramount in importance[2].

* Use MBE-P – when you don’t really care much about the errors or deviance as soon as it occurred. You have some time to correct them & they are not critical. This is followed when team member is having good experience in the area of working.
Leaders sometimes must practice passive MBE when required to supervise a large number of subordinates who report directly to the leaders[2]


1. Significant Behaviors of Transactional Leadership –https://leadershipchamps.wordpress.com/2008/09/19/significant-behaviors-of-transactional-leadership/
2. Transformational Leadership (Second Edition) BY Bernard M. Bass, Ronald E. Riggio, Lawrence Erlbaum Associates, Inc.,2006

Q & A – Which one to Adopt Transactional or Transformational Leadership?

One college student asked me a Question – “Which between the two should be adopted. My lecturer says transactional leader is best 4 efficiency and effectiveness. How true is this?”

My Answer:

To best of my knowledge, I agree with the existence of both leadership styles in everyone. As we displayed & practiced transactional leadership for many decades – it was considered as the best approach, but there is no complete truth in that. One need to evaluate the situation and decide whether to go with Transactional or Transformational & should not stick on to one in all situations.

Your lecturer says so because he practiced transactional in many (appropriate) situations & found to be producing results. Also transactional is practiced by teachers a lot – “praise the student who gets high grade and punish the one who takes lesser. As they get good results from their class, they will get good name from principal”. They will understand the real taste of teaching if they start practicing Transformational.

Goals? Are you kidding?

After my new year wishes to my friend, I asked him about his 2014 goals. He replied me with a puzzling voice – “Goals? Are you kidding? Let the life go as it is.” He continued “Why should I unnecessarily burden myself with setting goals & resolutions? At the year end, I will surely have few unaccomplished goals left in my list which will make me feel bad about myself. So, no goals.. nothing”

Many of us have the same feeling like my friend. Some people like me have different opinion about goals. Type the first & foremost sentence that comes to your mind for/against goals:

1. I set goals because ———————————

2. I don’t set goals because ———————————

Wish You a Happy New Year 2014!

I can say, this year, 2013, is the best & great year for me as a blogger. I like to thank all of you in this occasion.

In one side, blog stats give me the details about the blog reach, most liked posts, most commented posts,etc, on the other side, I tried other social media like facebook, pinterest, linkedin and YouTube to share the knowledge to wide audience & succeeded to some extent.

Here is the gist of happenings in 2013 & what you can expect in 2014:

* Unlike previous years, I took enough time to conceive & shape my blog posts. This year, posted around 15 posts.

* I spent quality time in creating ITTO Process Driller excel tool for PMP aspirants. Still I have some improvement ideas & Android Mobile App for the same. I am positive in releasing them in first half of 2014.

* I am also in the process of bringing out Project Management Mind Maps for all 47 processes – This year, I published 10 mind maps till now – 2 overall (in jpg format), 2 multi-level drill ITTO maps (in pdf format) & 6 process mind maps with detailed item description for each one of them. In 2014, I am planning to publish a PDF book with all Mind Maps as ready reference.

* In 2013, I posted 200+ status updates through facebook fan page which now has 388 fans.

* In 2013, I created couple of YouTube videos on Project Management topics. My main focus in 2014 is on creating more video for PM/ Leadership knowledge sharing, tips & tricks.

The one and only reason which is leading me to contribute more is – YOUR SUPPORT!  Without your support & feedback, I don’t think it is possible for me to do so much of activities. I expect the same support from you in the years to come. Wishing you a Happy New Year 2014!


What to copy from your Role Model?

In most of the Gym, I see posters of Arnold showing his well exercised muscles. By seeing these pictures, surely I get inspiration to develop my body something like this. Gyms also have mirrors in every corner for people to watch themselves – It creates enthusiasm, self-motivation & encouragement. Many followed Arnold as their role model for body building. Okay, do you think everyone built their body like Arnold? No!! but why?



Most of us wants to copy Arnold in physique but we forget to follow the methods that he followed to build his body. Each activity has two ingredients – the way how it is carried out & the outcome. Most of the time, disciplined approach produces expected outcome. Whatever be the result of the execution, disciplined way of execution always creates credibility & respect.

We can copy behaviors from a Role model and not the act. Though problems looks similar, each one has unique situation which can produce different result even you apply same solution, so copying someone’s solution will not help us. At the same time, copying the behavior (example – determination, focused, calm, compose) it will surely help us in that situation.